How to make big decisions if the small ones have been rubbish?
Finnish original: Kai minä halusin tätä
Publisher: Gummerus, 2021
Genre: literary fiction
Number of pages: 296 pp.
Reading material: Finnish original, English sample
A woman is lying down at the gynaecologist’s. She has got everything she wants. A husband, a dog, a lovely house—and now, a coil.
But something is not right. Why did she have to jump through so many hoops to get to this point? Why did she spend all that time and energy to get a man? What was the point of
trying to be beautiful? And above all: was it worth it?
I Must’ve Wanted This is a mercilessly acute, concise story about a woman’s life told with laser-sharp precision. She does not grow as a person. Instead, her life rotates around sleep and insomnia, her sofa, home and friends: things occur repeatedly and half-heartedly; the boring and familiar everyday shuffles along; life just carries on, one day after another. At times funny, at times moving, the novel makes us recognise the way life unfolds.
Sisko Savonlahti’s first novel Maybe This Summer Everything Will Change (2018) was nominated for the award for the best debut. It became a literary sensation that has sold over 45,000 copies in Finland alone. I Must’ve Wanted This has so far reached 20 000 readers.
“Savonlahti is a master in her acute portrayal of women’s mental and physical issues, bathing in the underachiever’s anxiety, garnishing it with dark humour.”
– Helsingin Sanomat newspaper
“Savonlahti’s language does not try to cover or reveal. It puts its trust in a banal abundance of expression that accumulates and shows the everyday absurdity better than a more lyrical turn of phrase could do. Her laconic view adds tenderness to the ludicrous situations.”
– Nuori Voima literary magazine
Also available
Maybe This Summer Everything Will Change ( 2018)
About the author
Sisko Savonlahti